It the hope of Jeromy and I that we can foster a strong bond of love and friendship between our children. We talk to Bennett about protecting his sisters and taking care of them. We are trying to teach them to have responsibility for one another. This is one of the reasons we plan on homeschooling our kids. If they are away from the home all day and building into the lives of their friends and peers, it will be alot harder to keep them connected to one another when they are home. Learning alongside one another and the mere proximity they will be in with one another will foster playing together and help them to learn how to deal with conflict and how to have a relationship with those older and younger than themselves. It is one of the problems that I see in modern day culture, how fractured we are from one another. Everyone is split up into age groups, even in churches today, singles, marrieds, young marrieds, retired, college, high school, junior high, the list is endless. It is not how real life works though. How often are we around only people in our own age group and place in life? That is not how it is in the workplace or in families. We are at a disadvantage if we choose to be isolated with only people like ourselves. Isn't it a better skill to have to be able to deal with those above and below us in life? There is so much to be learned from those who are older and more mature spiritually and emotionally. We are working to teach these things to our children and hopefully in the process our children will have a vision for this multigenerational way of life. 
Friday, October 19, 2007
Connected Siblings
Posted by Samantha at 11:43 AM
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8 comments:
I understand what you're saying, but "forcing your kids into being playmates" may not work as well as you hope!
I respectfully disagree with "anonymous". I only have one child, but I know a lot of large homeschooling families and the sibling relationships are, without exception, much closer than I ever was with my brother (we were not homeschooled). Just yesterday, I attended a baby shower at my Pastor's house (hosted by his wife). Their 5 boys (ages 11-2) never once bothered us because they were too busy playing together. The younger boys look up to their older brother and he actually enjoys the responsibility of being looked up to.
I would say that they weren't exactly forced to play with each other...they enjoy each other!
I have witnessed the same thing Jody. Families that choose to spend most of their time together are more strongly bonded and the children want to be together.
They naturally become friends. Our pastor has 8 children and our previous pastor had 9 and I loved seeing the friendships among them. It is what I want for my kids!
Home school chldren do well. One thing the parent must respect as a part of the "school learning" is social interaction which is not provided for in the home. So for the home school situation to work well you must participate the child in sports and camps. These are good ways to interact the kids with other kids, so they are not in a bubble you will create by keeping them home for school.
Social interaction is the very reason homeschooling is so important to us. I don't want my children spending unsupervised time with kids who do drugs, steal, lie, cheat, encourage them to have sex, etc. I went to public and private school and the social interaction I received was detrimental to my growth and maturation into an adult. I am so happy for my children that they will have social interaction with people that will encourage them to do profitable things with their life. We have plenty of friends at church with children that my kids will grow up with. The most important relationships will still be in our home. We hope that God chooses to bless us with a large family, so there will be plenty of socialization to go around. Anyone who has met my son knows he is the friendliest, most social 4-year old they know, without the help of pre-school and camps and sports. He talks to adults and has conversations with everyone he meets because he is learning how to interact with different ages of people, not just other 4 year olds. He isn't raised in a bubble. He is protected and nurtured so he can grow up to be a young adult who can make mature decisions for himself. He isn't old enough at 4 to make good decisions and choose right from wrong right, so I am not going to put him in the position to fail. Because I will be spending so much time building into his life, I will know when he has reached an age of maturity to be able to begin to make his own decisions and reap the consequences, good and bad. I have seen the home school situation work out very well without the need of surrogate socialization, ie. camps and sports. The "church" today is full of young adults leaving the faith in droves, young people who have beliefs that are no different from non-Christians. The young people we know that grew up in homes devoted to their education and spiritual maturity are leaps and bounds ahead of their peers. They are starting their own businesses and families, learning trades and aren't stuck in the eternal youth rut that most young people are in today. There is no magic formula to raising successful children, but discipleship and being present in their life is a good start.
Is your husband involved much with raising your children? I rarely, if ever, have heard you mention him or any interaction with them.
This is a mommy blog and as such it is just my own voice speaking my own opinions. I don't generally speak for my husband. He doesn't just agree with me on this subject matter though, these are his beliefs as well. He works hard and doesn't have the time I do to post on a blog that is why those that read it are subjected to my own views :o)
i think your hopes and goals for your kids are wonderful. we do plan on sending our kids to public school, and believer there are pros and cons to both public and homeschool. (i've known extremely well-adjusted kids on both sides, and horribly adjusted kids on both sides.)
we do hope to foster genuine, sincere relationships at home between our children. our lifestyle is pretty simple and we plan to maintain that--sometimes i think there gets to be too much of a rat-race.
you guys are great and your kids are just precious!
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